How Communication Works

What You Will Learn

• Name the parts of communication: sender, message, receiver, feedback
• Explain how words, tone, and body language work together
• Identify your own communication style and habits

Lesson Notes

The Communication Loop

Every message has a sender, a message, a receiver, and feedback. Communication breaks down when the message is unclear, the receiver is distracted, or no one checks for understanding.

Noise can be outside (a loud room) or inside (worry, anger, assumptions).

Words, Tone, and Body Language

People read much of our meaning from tone of voice and body language, not just words. Crossed arms, eye-rolling, or a sharp tone can cancel out polite words.

Open posture, appropriate eye contact, a calm voice, and facing the person send the message I respect you.

Communication Styles

• Passive: avoids conflict, doesn't share needs, may build resentment.
• Aggressive: demands, blames, or intimidates.
• Passive-aggressive: seems agreeable but shows anger indirectly (sarcasm, silent treatment).
• Assertive: honest, respectful, and clear. I feel… I need… Can we…? This is the goal.

Habits From Survival Mode

Some communication habits were learned to survive hard places: staying guarded, speaking sharply, or never showing weakness. Those habits made sense then. At work, they can be misunderstood. Naming them is the first step to choosing new ones.

Key Terms

In-Class Activities

Same Words, Different Message

In pairs, say “Sure, I can do that” in four ways: happy, annoyed, sarcastic, and tired. Your partner guesses the feeling. Discuss what changed the meaning.

Style Self-Check

Read the four styles. Circle the one you use most at home, most under stress, and most with authority figures. Write one situation where assertive communication would have helped.

Assignment: Communication Observation

Over the next week, observe three conversations (on your unit, at work detail, on TV, or in class).

• For each, note the style used (passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive, assertive) and one body-language clue.
• Rewrite one moment to show how it could have been said assertively.

Graded with the Module Assignment Rubric.

Reflection Journal

Proverbs 18:21 says death and life are in the power of the tongue. Describe a time someone's words brought life to you, and a time words brought harm. What kind of words do you want to be known for?

Prayer focus: Ask God to set a guard over your mouth and fill your words with life.

More Than Words

Angela said, "Fine, I'll do it," when her supervisor asked her to stay late. Her words were agreeable. Her crossed arms, rolled eyes, and sharp tone were not. The next week, she was passed over for a lead position and could not understand why. (Angela is a composite of many workers.)

Communication is much more than words. People read our tone of voice and body language, often before they hear what we say. When words and body language disagree, most people believe the body language.

Many of us learned communication habits in places where they helped us survive: staying guarded, speaking sharply so no one would take advantage, never showing weakness, or staying silent to avoid trouble. Those habits made sense then. In a workplace, they can be misread as hostility, disrespect, or lack of interest.

The goal of this course is not to erase who you are. It is to give you more choices. Assertive communication, which is honest and respectful at the same time, lets you speak up for yourself without attacking others. It sounds like: I feel… when… I need… Can we…?

Changing communication habits takes practice and grace. You will slip back into old patterns sometimes. That is normal. Every time you notice and choose differently, you are building a new habit.

Think About It

1. What communication habits did you learn to survive? ______________________
2. Which style (passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive, assertive) do you use most under stress? ______________________
3. What would assertive communication sound like in one real situation you face? ______________________

Daily Devotions for Week 1

Life and Death

Death and life are in the power of the tongue.— Proverbs 18:21 (KJV)

Words carry power. They can wound for years or heal in a moment. You have that power every time you speak. Today, choose words that bring life.

Reflect: Whose words brought life to you?

Pray: Lord, let my words bring life.

Do: Speak one life-giving sentence to someone today.

Out of the Heart

For of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaketh.— Luke 6:45 (KJV)

Our words reveal what fills our hearts. If we want our speech to change, we begin with the heart. God can fill us with patience, kindness, and peace that overflow into our words.

Reflect: What has been filling your heart lately?

Pray: Lord, fill my heart with what is good.

Do: Spend five quiet minutes asking God to fill your heart.

Renewed Minds

Be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.— Romans 12:2 (KJV)

Old habits formed in hard places can be renewed. Transformation happens as God reshapes how we think, which reshapes how we speak and act. You are not stuck.

Reflect: What old habit do you want God to renew?

Pray: Lord, renew my mind and my habits.

Do: Notice one old habit today and choose differently once.

A Word in Season

A word spoken in due season, how good is it!— Proverbs 15:23 (KJV)

Timing matters. The right word at the right moment can change someone's day. Wisdom includes knowing when to speak and when to wait.

Reflect: When has the right word at the right time helped you?

Pray: Lord, give me wisdom about when to speak.

Do: Wait before speaking in one conversation today.

Gracious Words

Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones.— Proverbs 16:24 (KJV)

Kind words are healing. They do not cost anything, yet they can strengthen someone's body and soul. Be generous with pleasant words.

Reflect: Who in your life needs a sweet word?

Pray: Lord, make my words sweet and healing.

Do: Give three sincere compliments today.